Thursday, 11 April 2013

An Aspergirl and Birthday Celebrations, Or Not

Asperger's Syndrome is often called social awkwardness because we find it hard to socialise with others. This is definitely true for me when I was a child, and more so when it came to birthdays. As a child, I never had any birthday parties (I didn't really have any friends to invite), and I never went to anyone else's parties, either. I was a very shy child, and in some ways I still am that shy child. As I grew up, I didn't mind celebrating my birthday, receiving cards and presents and telling people it was my birthday. I liked people saying 'Happy Birthday' to me.

I remember the only adult birthday party I had for my 21st. I had it at my home and invited close family and friends. I put myself in charge of the music, in the corner the then dining room, and there I stayed. I was asked to dance with relatives but said no. I didn't even go and socialise and chat to the relatives and my friend's family in the other room. As I think back to that occasion I cringe and am embarrassed. I know I couldn't help it then, but I still feel that I could have made the effort just to say hello.

Now as an adult, I don't mind celebrating my birthday. Not with parties, but by going out for meals with family and friends. I went out for a meal for my 30th with work colleagues. I went out for a meal with family for my 40th (not that I really want to remember that one as it was spoilt by someone – not me). Although, I know at these meals, I still don't mingle and chat to family on the other tables.

So, that is how Asperger's affects my birthday celebrations, or not. I am blogging about this as April is Autism Awareness Month and I want to spread awareness.

Julie Day

Blog: An Aspergirl and Birthday Celebrations, or not at

'Don't Get Mad' is now available for $1.99. Book 4 of Geraldine's Gems romance series

Available at Smashwords: Smashwords:

Don't Get Mad: Sandra is sad about her failure of her marriage to control-freak husband, Jim. Until her aunt Geraldine arrives and tells her 'Don't Get Mad, Get Even'. So Sandra joins the local gym and meets hunk Troy, and gets fitter and healthier and falls in love. She also gets more confident, and finally stands up to Jim in pubic, and wins.

For more authors taking part in this Birthday Book Blast, please go to Stacy Whisenand's blog at


Tamara Ward said...

Thanks for this post, Julie, and opening my eyes to a perspective I wouldn't have considered without your post.

Julie Day said...

Thanks, Tamara. That's the whole idea.

Rhonda Hopkins said...

My great niece was diagnosed with Fragile X when she was about 3. It's on the autism spectrum I think. Noises, lots of people, confusion - all caused problems for her. With therapy and patience from her family, she's learned how to be a part of get togethers. She knows when she's had enough and can tell she needs a break. No one questions it when she goes off to a room to isolate herself for a while. She reemerges when she's ready. She's now 10 and is awesome. She can't function in a classroom though, so she's home-schooled. But she's involved in other activities where she interacts with kids, such as cheerleading, buddy ball and therapeutic horseback riding. All programs that adapt to her special needs and they've all been great. There's been a big difference just in the past couple of years. I'm so proud of her. She's a super sweet kid and extremely funny. :-)

Thanks for sharing your experience and helping to highlight autism and aspergers.

Julie Day said...

Thanks, Rhonda. It's great to hear that your niece is getting better. It does help when you get involved in activities you like doing esp with others.