When I last wrote about a change in home, it was about me coming home after hospital and having carers myself. Those two weeks went and Mum came home, and that was the next change. I had spoken to Mum briefly on the phone a couple of days beforehand, thanks to a kind chaplain. Mum's voice then, which sounded frailer, should have made me realise how she would be when she came home but I was just glad to see her again. That day was really hard for me as I saw how Mum was for the first time. She was confused to where she was, which is a sign of delirium. Also she said some strange things to my brother. It was to be the start of her time with carers doing her personal care such as washing her. Although Mum had been very slow at walking before I went into hospital, she had been independent still and able to walk round the house. Do cooking and washing etc with me. So it was hard to see her stuck in a hospital bed and having carers see to her personal needs. Having experienced that myself during my own hospital stay after surgery, I knew what it was like. It can make you feel useless and frustrated. I had hoped that seeing me be able to walk about again might encourage and inspire Mum to do the same, but it didn't because her brain had changed with dementia and she didn't want to. I think she might have still been depressed at the time. I had to get used to seeing a new Mum, one who was confused a lot of the time and started saying weird things. Although Mum had had carers helping her before I went into hospital, these were new people, and it was hard to get used to at first, even though I did think that it was good that Mum was having the same carers day after day so she wouldn't get confused so much.
Did I get on with the carers? That is another story.
PS I know that the term 'Asperger's' isn't used anymore because of the history of the man whom it was named after, but I was diagnosed with it, so that is what I say and call myself. I also say I am autistic.
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