The differences between a tantrum and a meltdown

 

I was going to do another short video about meltdowns, but as I now have a cold I am writing this instead. I might do the video next week. Following my last video about what are meltdowns, I thought I'd give a quick idea what I think the two differences are between meltdowns and tantrums. To listen to what I had to say, catch my video here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJ4-EvwY09M&t=3s

1. When a child has a tantrum it is often attention seeking. So they might look up during the tantrum to see if someone has seen them. When a child/adult has a meltdown we are focussed on our own feelings. We might know what we are doing but we don't intend to seek attention.

2. When a child has a tantrum they can often shout out eg I hate you. When a child has a meltdown, they are focussed on their own emotions and not shouting out.

I know when I have had meltdowns, I cry and hate being the cause of attention. I try to calm myself down so no one can see how distressed I am.

I hope that makes sense.

Let me know what you think.

Shopping as an Aspie

When I usually go shopping, I don't think about myself as an Aspie and how everything affects me. I just get on with where I want to go and what I want to get, then go home. But last time I went shopping, I took  note of all the things around me that could affect me as an Aspie. Here is what I thought.

On the bus going there, if I'm with my mum I will chat to her so I try to tune in to what she is saying and tune out others talking; but this can be hard when other people have v loud voices and shout to each other, and little ones crying. If I am on my own I usually look out the window and tune out other people talking around me.

Inside the shopping centre I noted all the lights and the music. The lights were quite bright and could really affect someone, esp a child, with a sensory challenge to lights. The music was quite loud in places, with different music coming from different shops at various levels. Can be a hard challenge to a child with major challenges with noise. I don't mind communicating with shop staff because I have to, but I try not to speak as much as I want to. One thing I don't like is having to go back and check something with staff in a shop eg being charged wrongly. I hate this as I feel that everyone is looking at me, and I hate confrontations.

So, here are my tips for shopping as an Aspie:

1. Write a list of what you want to buy
2. Put that list in order of the shops you need to go to
3. Try to tune out other people's chat on the bus
4. At the shopping centre, try to tune out the constant chatter and music
5. Concentrate on just what you want and where you are going.
6. If you get flustered, and have an Aspie card, and feel you might have a meltdown, then show it to people. Don't be afraid to do that.

So that is how I felt shopping as an Aspie and my tips for a good shop. If you have any more tips, please let me know.

An Aspergirl and Sensitivities

As someone with Asperger's Syndrome, I am sensitive to a lot of things, the main ones being noise and messiness on people. By that, I mean if someone is eating and leaves food round their mouth. This makes me feel ill.

Noise - When I was a child, I hated the noise of trains going over the subway. I always either used to wait until they went past or run through the subway to the other side. Now, I don't mind as I have had to get used to it over the years when I went to work and had to get trains. I still don't like the noise of balloons popping, and someone scratching the surface of a table or board. That squeakiness puts my teeth on edge.

Also, I have become very sensitive to people talking loudly in a small room. This is sensory overload for me, and I have to either go into another quiet room or upstairs or in the garden.

Food - I think this sensitivity comes from years ago when I was at primary school. I knew a girl who was bullied by others and one day she was so sad that when she ate her dinner, her hair hung in her food and the food stayed there. This really made me feel ill. I still can't abide people leaving food on them, esp their mouths.

One other thing I am sensitive to, is when someone I know cries, I cry too. Most of the time I can't sense other people's true emotions having Asperger's, but when someone cries you can certainly and I find this upsetting and get tearful too.

So, what are you sensitive about? Let me know, and if it has anything to do with having AS.