The differences between a tantrum and a meltdown

 

I was going to do another short video about meltdowns, but as I now have a cold I am writing this instead. I might do the video next week. Following my last video about what are meltdowns, I thought I'd give a quick idea what I think the two differences are between meltdowns and tantrums. To listen to what I had to say, catch my video here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mJ4-EvwY09M&t=3s

1. When a child has a tantrum it is often attention seeking. So they might look up during the tantrum to see if someone has seen them. When a child/adult has a meltdown we are focussed on our own feelings. We might know what we are doing but we don't intend to seek attention.

2. When a child has a tantrum they can often shout out eg I hate you. When a child has a meltdown, they are focussed on their own emotions and not shouting out.

I know when I have had meltdowns, I cry and hate being the cause of attention. I try to calm myself down so no one can see how distressed I am.

I hope that makes sense.

Let me know what you think.

Me and lying

 I mentioned that there are some lies I can say. Here are two. If someone (scammer) phones and says ‘about your computer’, I will say I don’t have a computer. If you wore something that looked horrible on you and you were a friend, I would say ‘mmm’. I wouldn’t want to upset you. I hate confrontation.

Yesterday I talked about lies that I can tell. Today I will mention ones I can't. I call them big lies eg if someone asks me to lie that I was with them when I wasn't, I just can't. I might try but it doesn't come out right and you are able to tell that I am lying. So if I say I was somewhere, I was there.

I will give you an example of what I mean about the latter. This happened years ago when I was working at Guy's campus. In the early days of my job in student services I would get given the task of going to the other campus (it was Guy's and St Thomas's) and set up exams for the students. On this one time I had set it up and had to wait for the invigilator to arrive. I needed to go to the toilet, so I did. While I was in there, I heard banging on the outside door. I think I called out I was here. I had assumed it was the invigilator. When I came out I went to the hall but there was no one there. I then went to the security and asked if anyone had arrived to get into the hall. They replied no. I went back to the hall and no one came. Anyway, when I got back to Guy's and where I worked, the staff member in charge at the time called me into his office. He told me off for not being there. I told him I was there but in the toilet, and what had happened. In effect, he really was saying to me that I was a liar. I hated that person at the time. I was so angry. I knew I was telling the truth. It was years later, after I was diagnosed with Asperger's and read about lying, or rather not being able to lie, that I knew. I cannot tell a lie. The staff member left to work in another department at the other campus soon after that.