An Aspie and another change at home

 When I last wrote about a change in home, it was about me coming home after hospital and having carers myself. Those two weeks went and Mum came home, and that was the next change. I had spoken to Mum briefly on the phone a couple of days beforehand, thanks to a kind chaplain. Mum's voice then, which sounded frailer, should have made me realise how she would be when she came home but I was just glad to see her again. That day was really hard for me as I saw how Mum was for the first time. She was confused to where she was, which is a sign of delirium. Also she said some strange things to my brother. It was to be the start of her time with carers doing her personal care such as washing her. Although Mum had been very slow at walking before I went into hospital, she had been independent still and able to walk round the house. Do cooking and washing etc with me. So it was hard to see her stuck in a hospital bed and having carers see to her personal needs. Having experienced that myself during my own hospital stay after surgery, I knew what it was like. It can make you feel useless and frustrated. I had hoped that seeing me be able to walk about again might encourage and inspire Mum to do the same, but it didn't because her brain had changed with dementia and she didn't want to. I think she might have still been depressed at the time. I had to get used to seeing a new Mum, one who was confused a lot of the time and started saying weird things. Although Mum had had carers helping her before I went into hospital, these were new people, and it was hard to get used to at first, even though I did think that it was good that Mum was having the same carers day after day so she wouldn't get confused so much.

Did I get on with the carers? That is another story.

PS I know that the term 'Asperger's' isn't used anymore because of the history of the man whom it was named after, but I was diagnosed with it, so that is what I say and call myself. I also say I am autistic.

Why children can be alone in the playground

One of the questions I was asked to answer here was - why would children behave certain ways. So, I thought I'd post about why children would be seen to be alone in the playground, something I certainly have experience with as a child with Asperger's. So, here I am going to explain why I think it is from what I have read.

Why do some children be alone and not join in with others? This was me when I was at school - both at primary and secondary. I never really understood why until recently when I read about Asperger's and autism. The reason is 'social interaction impairment' and 'social imagination impairment'. This means that a child on the autism spectrum (and adult too) is confused about what to do and say to make friends. When do they speak? What do they say to make someone like them and get them to join in? How do they join in with games?

With me, I either was alone, tagged along with others and did what I was told to do, or played with the younger children at primary school. At secondary school I was just alone, or tagged along with other alone children.

So what do you do when you see a lone child? I am not an expert and don't have a degree about this, I am just saying from reading and experience.

1. Either you can approach the child, from the front and never from behind, and ask them if they want to play.
2. Explain the game to them
3. Or if you aren't sure, then leave them alone.
4. You could watch them to see what they like doing, then one day, talk to them about it.

So, they are my thoughts on this subject.